Feeling Blue

Feeling blue and wanted to find someone to chat with. But at this moment, I can’t find anyone to chat with. Now is 4am in the morning, who will be online and accompany me? I’m listening to some sad oldies while I’m feeling down. I know it might make me feel worst but I just can’t help it. Or maybe listen to some sad songs will ease my feel? It’s a very funny thing that I always listener to someone, but I just can’t be the one who talk. I just don’t know how to express myself. Hmm… my English sucks, my way of expressing myself sucks as well. Damn, why I just can’t improve my English? I listen to a lot of people, I listen to what they said, and I will tell them what I feel about it. Sometimes I even give advice. I’ve been listening too much, I need someone to listen to me but I just afraid and I just not used to express myself out. Perhaps human are meant to be like that. God gives you the ability to listen, to be a good listener but in the same time he might took away the ability of you to express yourself. Humans are imperfect, I’m one of them. Maybe I should work myself out in order to overcome my imperfection. But where should I start from? Or just let it be and life will be easier? Diploma is finishing and I wonder how my future will be. I’m not good in study or I’m just lazy? Don’t feel like continue writing anymore, I think I should go to bed now. Lay down and think, think of my future, think of myself, what am I for and what am I going to be.