Hmm... I'm Back

It's been awhile i didn't post anything here. I've been having some problem, but i already overcome it. I want to thanks a lot of people. When i was down and need help, there are some people that keep on encourage me and help me to get over my depress. Michelle, Gwen, Elaine and lotsa people. I love you all, very appreciate that having you all in my life. Michelle, how are you now? Hope you are fine now. I'm at Johor already, need to start my new life here. I hope you are doing fine at the other side. Gwen, thanks for the sim card =) it's been nice with you, i will miss you de. Elaine, so nice to meet you, my kai mui. At least before i go back i still got the chance go out with you. Gambatte in your STPM o, hope you get flying colors in your STPM.

So, i'm getting on the track now, i will try my best to update my blog and let you all get my latest news =) I hope my new life here will make me better. I still miss KL and all the friends there. I promise to all of you that whenever i got the chance, i will surely go back and visit all of my friends.

Suddenly i think of something and feel like typing out =)
(Life is like a story, is a story about yourself. you can choose to be a happy ending or a sad ending. you are the one who hold the key to unlock your story to others. how the story itself goes are all depends on you. So, choose your way wisely =)
sometimes we must let things goes with it's own way. thinking of how to change a thing sometimes doesn't really help but only making you headache. Thinking is good but over thinking or worried is not really a good idea. It might get you confused or etc.)

So, janna to all my fellow friends, please take care and wait for my blog to updated. I need to get some sleep now cause i took my medicine as i sick already. Nitezzz

错过的遗憾

有时候觉得人很奇怪，尤其是对爱情的执着和无奈。有没有试过曾经很爱很爱一个人，爱到他说什么都可以，爱到做你最不爱做的事情，爱到没有天没有地，只要他不经意的看你一眼，就觉得世界因为有他而美丽。。你会为他去找一样他喜欢的东西，你会偷偷准备好他爱吃的食物，你会为他编制了许多如果的事，你会哼他最爱的歌，你会刻意买和他一样的东西，你会风雨无阻的走过他家让他发现你的存在，你会因为他开心而手舞足蹈，你会因为他难过而偷偷掉眼泪，你会偷偷在夜里叫他宝贝，一天又一天，一年又一年，没没有改变。。直到有一天，他说他爱着另一个她，他在你面前掉下无助的眼泪，他说他的世界不能没有她。。。刹那间，你发现原来你千算万算，少算了他原来不爱你。。此刻流的泪绝不会比他少，而且你体会了心碎。。后来，你逼自己走出这错误的陷阱，开始另一段旅途，一天又一天，一年又一年，一直很勇敢应付，渐渐地，你放下了对他的思念。。过了些年，你和他在街角碰面，你看了他一眼，造就了他整个美丽世界。。他开始为你寻找一样你爱的东西，他开始把你爱吃的食物偷偷放在你家门口，他开始为你假设了许多未来，他开始哼着你最爱的歌曲，他开始买你买过的东西，他开始驾着车一次又一次地经过你的家，他开始因为你快乐而比你快乐，他开始因为你伤心而不知所措，他开始在来电显示名单上把你的名字换成老婆，一天又一天，一年又一年，一直持续着。。直到有一天，你和另一个男生亲密地走在长长的路上，你挽着对方的手，笑得正甜，花开得正艳。。刹那间，他突然发现原来这些年不管他多努力，你还是已经离开了他的世界。。有些事，错过了就不能重来，留下的只剩心酸的遗憾。。是无奈吗？还是上天早已安排了这一场戏？对不起，离开的始终离开了。。

My Life

Nowadays my life is meaningless. I’ve been doing the same thing everyday. Eat, sleep, online, daydreaming. I got nothing better to do. Why am I having such a pathetic life? Is it because my life sucks? Or maybe I just wasting my time and waiting to go back hometown? Try to read something but the moment I pick up the book and I throw it away. I just don’t feel like studying at all. Now I totally have phobia on books. My mood still swings. I still can’t help to think from what I have thought. Everything just flash back and passing by in my brains. I’m totally sad and hope to avoid it. I’m tried to run away from it but I failed. Why am I such a lazy person? I need to change myself, but start from where? What should I need to do now? I don’t know where to start, don’t know what to do.

. . . .

My mood hasn’t turned any better. From blue and now is grey. Been thinking a lot of things, but I still can’t figure it out anyway to overcome my problem. Why you must give up something to get something? Why we must lost something in our life no matter what. Why I give myself so much pressure? Why I can’t help myself to think? Why am I so depressed? Why am I exists in this world? How good if I’m now at another place that no one know me. So I can live in my own world. What am I living for? What is my life about? There is a lot of question mark in my mind. Who can help me to solve it? Why I get complicated?

Feeling Blue

Feeling blue and wanted to find someone to chat with. But at this moment, I can’t find anyone to chat with. Now is 4am in the morning, who will be online and accompany me? I’m listening to some sad oldies while I’m feeling down. I know it might make me feel worst but I just can’t help it. Or maybe listen to some sad songs will ease my feel? It’s a very funny thing that I always listener to someone, but I just can’t be the one who talk. I just don’t know how to express myself. Hmm… my English sucks, my way of expressing myself sucks as well. Damn, why I just can’t improve my English? I listen to a lot of people, I listen to what they said, and I will tell them what I feel about it. Sometimes I even give advice. I’ve been listening too much, I need someone to listen to me but I just afraid and I just not used to express myself out. Perhaps human are meant to be like that. God gives you the ability to listen, to be a good listener but in the same time he might took away the ability of you to express yourself. Humans are imperfect, I’m one of them. Maybe I should work myself out in order to overcome my imperfection. But where should I start from? Or just let it be and life will be easier? Diploma is finishing and I wonder how my future will be. I’m not good in study or I’m just lazy? Don’t feel like continue writing anymore, I think I should go to bed now. Lay down and think, think of my future, think of myself, what am I for and what am I going to be.

The End of the Road

Today is the last day of my life in diploma. It’s been 4 years that I stayed in KL to study. These 4 years bring me a lot of memories. I will definitely miss all my classmates. We shared joy and sad in the pass 2 years. We even have our very own “Da Pig Family” that includes me (Wild Boar), Yih Chyi (Pig Queen), Pui Mun (Lil Piggy) and lastly Yuen Theng (Pig Head Biscuit). Envy huh? A guy and 3 leng lui in the family, haha. Today I met them at KFC after I came back from McD with Willy. Afterwards I followed them go back to college and took some photo. Now only I realize something that the girls in my class are actually pretty, haha. Today they all wearing skirts… heh. I went to attend my last tutorial class. Mr. Ng Chan Wah’s tutorial @@ I’m very surprised that he didn’t scold me for din attending his class for such a long time but he do surprised to see me. The whole class I sit there and listening but I can’t understand anything, LOL! We had a chat after the tutorial; he asked me what my future plan is and encourages me. Mr. NG changed a lot compare to the first time I saw him. He told me is fate that we met and he will be sad seeing us graduate or leaving. Yeah, so do I. I’m used to the living style in KL and now I’m going back to JB, I think it will take me some time to get over it. But I definitely will miss all my friends here. After I go back, don’t know when will I get the chance to come back KL and visit them. I hope I can always keep in touch with them. Rainy day and I’m feeling sad because we are going apart and live our life. Each of us will have a different story soon. Don’t know when will we meet again or perhaps never get the chance?

I will post the picture as soon as I learn it how to do so. =)
So now, I think I stop here and maybe continue tonight. Is time for me to rest awhile and flashback some sweet memories with them.

To those who read this, have a nice day ^^

From the left is Theng Theng (Pig Head Biscuit), me (Wild Boar), Chyi Chyi (Pig Queen), and Mun Mun (Lil Piggy) We are "Da Pig Family"

My Day~*

Rainy day, a weather that very nice to sleep. But still can't sleep, not sure why. I'm kinda tired after i went to PIKOM (pc fair) at KLCC today but afta i took a cold water bath and till now i'm still so refreshing =( Listening Jay's songs and folding paper stars just now. Damn i'm too free now, nothing better to do. Still learning how to manage the blog to be a better one. Now i owns a blog, perhaps i can express myself out in the blog rather than keeping all the things in my heart, is that a good idea or not? Sometimes i got things to share but can't find people to share with but only keep inside me. My english is that good, maybe through here i can brush up my english =) My current life now is boring and meaningless. Everyday wake up and just facing my pc 24/7 and waiting for the exam to come. That SUCKS ! Suddenly i hate myself, LOL !!

DaY 2

Very Cold and windy day. Now is 4.24am in the morning and i'm still sitting here writting blog? Today's mood is blue, not sure why and don't feel like to know why. Started to fold paper stars this afternoon, mayb i'm just too free and nothing to do. I'm always think about a question - Why sometimes life is just so complicated? I started to write strange things, maybe simply because i'm just not enough sleep though. I think i better try and go to sleep. Nitez to all my friends.